15 Quick "Q and A" with Ada...

Hey lovelies,

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

I know I've been M.I.A for a while but I assure you all that I'll be back and active this year. Here's my first post for 2017 with some Q and A's that I quickly scribbled. Thought I should make it a little personal so you all could get to know me. I hope you enjoy them and let me know your thoughts about my responses in the comment section below.


1. What are your pet names? What do you prefer to be called?

Apart from a whole bunch of pet names my husband randomly makes up when he feels like, Ada or Adaora is absolutely fine.

2. What do you do during your spare time?

A lot. As a result of my busy schedule, one thing you will for sure catch me doing is SLEEPING. I don't joke with my sleep especially when I have the slightest opportunity to. Otherwise, it's either I'm watching a movie with my hubby when he gets back from work, or I'm blogging or just reading an online article.


3. What is your Primary Love Language and Why?

Yes I do have a love language and the one that speaks the loudest is "Acts of Service". To me, it's the most powerful form of love and devotion to your partner.  I'm one of those girls that believe in talking less and doing more. A lot of people have said that a woman is being wooed by what she hears not what she sees while on the other hand, men are moved by what they see. That's a myth to me. You may give your loved one words of affirmation, but they are thinking, “Cut the talk. If you love me, you would do something around here.” For them, actions truly speak louder than words. 

I respect other love languages, but "Act of Service" tends to  be the deal breaker.  If your partner keeps talking and sugar-coating words more than the "doing" part, you might begin to feel some sense of un-seriousness in them.

4. What is your advice to Single ladies out there waiting for Mr. Right?

First and foremost, make yourself READY!. We ladies are so caught up with the illusion that we need that perfect gentleman that will sweep us off our feet. But we've failed to ask ourselves, are we the right person for the right man out there? Have we readily prepared and nurtured ourselves to enter this institution called Marriage? If we are praying for a future partner, also remember that a Godly man out there is also praying for his Mrs. Right too. Every man would want to look at his wife someday and thank God that she is exactly the woman he prayed for.

Secondly, PATIENCE is very key. It is a rare virtue which not so many of us possess. We give God timelines forgetting that God's timing is the best. It is better to marry LATE than to marry WRONG and trust me, even in God's calendar, there is nothing like a late marriage. Let's learn to be patient and marry right once and for all.

5. What are the 2 super attractive qualities you like in a Man?

Being very successful at what you do and staying HUMBLE at the same time. It's like one of the deal breakers for me. I find this quality rare in most men who are extremely successful and self-made. To me, that's the time you really get to know the man for who he truly is.

Secondly ATTENTIVENESS: Knowing that he is always there to listen to me, value my opinions, show concern for my interests rather than focusing on my insecurities. Such quality is beyond human description or comprehension.

6. What are you completely bored of right now?

The hype in social media where folks try to both impress and oppress others. We see people on daily basis trying to portray a completely different image abstract from whom they truly are while some viewers on the other hand, get carried away by these false flamboyance  and end up putting themselves in messy situations that they cannot easily come out from in order to be like them.


6. Heels or Flats?

Heels

7. Any regrets about life?

None. Mistakes are always bound to happen and we are not expected to be perfect in any form or shape. The most important thing is learning from those mistakes and ensuring that they serve as lessons and life examples to guide us throughout life.

8. Do you believe in getting Comfortable or Settling?

Well, it depends on the context. Overall, I don't believe one should get comfortable about their current position because it will make you dwell in mediocracy. It's always good to get up and look for opportunities which can help you harness your current knowledge or skill. Sometimes, people just prefer to do what they are already used to, they prefer to stay in their comfort zones because they are afraid of change. They are afraid of being rejected or denied. They are afraid of the unknown and it's consequences which is fine. Settling for less shouldn't be an option for anyone. We should always learn to thrive in the midst of any obstacle.

9. Any Pet Peeves?

Frenemies. People faking to be your friend when they actually know that they're not. Let's be clear, either we're friends or we're not...the in-between situation is tiring and energy-consuming. 

10. Any advice for youths and young adults?

Always believe in yourself and in what you do. The only thing that can stop you in moving forward is the person you see when you look in the mirror. You are your best support system and let no one tell you that you are not worth achieving that goal.

11. Are you more likely to avoid conflict or engage it head-on?

Avoid it right on.


12. Do you have a whole lot of acquaintances or just a few very close friends? Why?

Few close friends. Makes my life so easy and drama-free.


13. When do you find yourself singing?

It's an unconscious act for me. Singing naturally comes anytime, anywhere..


14. What was the best news you've received so far this year?

When my dad's operation went successful without any complications

15. How do you think one can make their lives more meaningful, starting from today?

The ability to stop procrastinating. Procrastination at its worst does not bring any favorable circumstances. It's s a bad habit I know we all are somehow trying to curb because it's neither considered as good in one’s personal life nor is it accepted in one’s occupation, because the person who is in this habit faces problems in his personal life and loses many chances, such as, promotions or rewards etc. in his employment. He is unable to maintain his self-image in a good manner among his peers. Management is not willing to support him in the process of career development. There is not any progress for him in terms of gaining good experience as well. So I urge us to drop this bad practice and begin the act of "DOING". This will go a long way to bring about a favourable outcome.

I hope you'll enjoyed my Q and A session. Please let me know if you would like to see more of this on the blog, that way we can make it a series.

Until next time, remain blessed!!!

Lots of Love,

Ada... xoxo

Our Guest Post on "The Praying Woman"

Hello Lovelies,

How are you all doing? As some of you may already  know, my article was featured last week on The Praying Woman's Website titled When God Refuses To Open A Door and I was glad to see quite a number of ladies who shared their testimonies as to how they believed God for an open door and He gave them something totally different, far much better than they could ever ask or imagine.

Sometimes, we think we are too qualified for a particular position based on the knowledge and experiences we've acquired, hoping that as soon as the interviewer takes a glance at our resume or hear us speak, we will immediately be hired. This isn't always the case especially for faith-believing Christians. God can position you in any given place, where you do not even qualify to be. He can break every protocol for your sake. Where you think you'll be placed in life might fail you and you'll begin to ask God why. Is something wrong?

Be calm! God isn't asleep. Not all open doors are doors of blessings, some are open doors in disguise to lure you into further destruction. God is preparing a better place for you that is why he has refused to open that door. His time to elevate you has come and you won't remain in that same level again.

Click on the above link to read our featured post!

Have a blessed week and I  look forward to seeing you all in my next blog post..

Lots of love,

Ada xoxo!!!

Why Am I in this Relationship?

As a huge fan of Judge Lynn Toler's TV show, DIVORCE COURT, I've come to realize that so many relationships and marriages fail because people shy away from asking themselves and their supposed partners the necessary questions before venturing into this thing called Love.  We often misplace lust for love because they both come with very strong emotions and if care isn't taken, you might simply be lusting after someone thinking you are in love. There is little to no effort made towards preparedness and often times, you find out that one partner is so fixed on trying to correct or change the other person's actions without even realizing that they might just be the cause of that problem.

Over the years, I've attended several relationship seminars/workshops and when certain questions were being asked by fellow participants, I then realized that people actually do go into relationships for the weirdest reasons. Reasons such as feeling lonely, desired, bored or just broke to the extent of not having enough money to pay their rent. You'll hear words like "I need someone who is financially capable to cater for my needs....  It's a man's world and it's not my sole responsibility to foot the bills... bla bla bla". Well, I understand that sometimes people's backgrounds and upbringings play a major role in the way they think about certain aspects of life and the economic system can also have a negative impact on their ability to make certain ends meet but this isn't still a valid reason to venture into a relationship. And as always, any relationship entered into with such motives will eventually have a U-turn and the repercussion can be very disastrous. Some others dive in due to parental pressure, physical attraction, trying to feel among, and all what not. Alot out there are incredibly desperate for some TLC because they feel they've been single for a long time and it's time to get some good loving.

Making the Right Decision

I had the urge to share this brief message that  I titled:

"MAKING THE RIGHT DECISION"...

Our ability to do what is "RIGHT" regardless of the surrounding circumstance or what people will say is what makes us PECULIAR. Sometimes we find ourselves in situations whereby we are uncertain about how well we should handle that particular problem without hurting those we love. This uncertainty however, might lead us into confiding in those who do not have the adequate knowledge and right experience to direct us to the right path.

Christian Courtship and Marriage...

A number of people still try to figure out what courtship means and how this differs from just dating. Years back, I was of the impression that courtship began the very moment a man proposes to a woman and as soon as she says YES to him, they are no longer considered to be dating, they are now in Courtship.  As 'chezzy' as this may sound, I figured out that I wasn't alone in this idea. Some people are stern believers of this.

Courtship is being in a Godly relationship with the intention of getting married. Some call it "Dating with Purpose". A biblical foundation has to be laid because this is a  preparatory period for aspiring couples to get to know one another and decide if they are worth living together for a lifetime.  In courtship, there is a common goal - where the couple not only plan towards the wedding but most importantly, the marriage itself. Amos 3:3.

Weathering The Storms of Your Life....

Sometimes, we wonder why we go through certain difficult situations in life and when things don't turn out the way we planned, we then begin to convince ourselves to believe that we are truly being punished for the sins of our fathers or a crime we've committed in the past which might be as a result of youthful exuberance or total ignorance. As humans, we are bound to feel this way because we want to trace the root cause of our problems and sort out ways to handle them up-front. This I agree with, but the sad truth is that very few people out there believe that problems, trials and tribulations are bound to happen. We should expect them to manifest. God didn’t promise us that we will not experience turbulence in life neither did he say that the enemy will not attack but His word to us is that when the enemy comes like a flood, he will surely raise up a standard against him. Isaiah 59:19. That means we are already guaranteed divine protection and defense. He also assured us in "Deuteronomy 28:7", that "He will grant that the enemies who rise up against you will be defeated before you. They will come in one way, but flee from you seven ways" (i.e; when an army is overthrown or dissipated).

I Forgive You, But I Will Never Forget!

Using a ballpark estimate, I would say that 89% of people in the world do forgive without getting the incident off their minds. Why is this so difficult? The art of easily forgetting something done wrong to you could vary, and this might depend on the impact of that situation. It is very easy to forgive a child who lied to you about having excellent grades in his report card, only to later on find out from his teacher that he failed in most of his subjects. Once disciplinary measures have been put in place, that incident could be forgotten in just weeks. Another quick example is if someone bumps into you in a subway station. "Sorry", they say, and you answer "No problem". Leaving the subway, you'll never think of it. Who cares? But how do you preach forgetfulness to a married man or woman whose partner was caught in the act of adultery with their best friend or closest sibling? Worse case scenarios, you find out after 5 years of your marriage that your only child isn't yours. Your wife took in for another man and all these years, you've been grooming a child in your home who isn't biologically yours. That's a life-time grudge! Oh, did I just say grudge? Someone's life could be lost when this truth is finally revealed.

It's tragic how those we deeply love, cherish and trust find ways to hurt and betray us in return. Most relationships that kick off so well eventually take a different turn which ends up creating doubts and trust issues as we move on in life. The human behaviour is "hard-wired" and our initial instinct would be to retaliate as soon as we have been hurt by someone. This is because our pride and self-esteem has been injured. Trust that has been built for years have suddenly been shattered in a split second. Something so valuable has been lost and for that, we want recompense for the damage.